Wednesday, January 6, 2010

Lasting Changes

Is there a nagging sense of inadequacy about something in your life? It may be simple or complex, but it's there, and it bugs you. And since it's January, you vow you're going to change; you'll mentally erase your failures of the previous year.

I don't know about you, but my changes are nearly identical each January, which obviously means they haven't lasted. Why do I make the same promises over and over? Why can't I make them work?

Since this month is all about embracing the old, I thought about some of my old resolutions that did stick. Ten years ago, I decided to drink more water, and it became a lifelong habit. Three years ago, I decided to read the Bible every day; I still rarely miss a day. And isn't it funny that I never have to make resolutions regarding my writing?

I pondered this phenomenon a while. Why do I follow through with some changes and not others? After much reflection, a slice of leftover cake, and a cup of tea, I realized why.

The changes that lasted depended on two beliefs:

1. I believed I could accomplish the resolution.
2. I believed my life would be better if I did.

What are some changes you've made over the years that have made your life better? Why did you stick with those changes and not others?

Join me on Friday when we'll celebrate the small stuff.

34 comments:

  1. Hmmm, I don't know. I've never really made resolutions, so I'm not sure what has stuck and what hasn't.
    Good for you about the water and Bible reading. Those are both things I need to work on.

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  2. Where I come from, one doesn't EVAH drink the water. Sulfur. UGH! So when I moved to NC, I found out that water is really good when it comes from my spring. Mmmm

    I need to make an effort to read my Bible every day. I always try, but sometimes it gets pushed to the back burner. So I resolve to do that every day!

    Jill, I don't think I've ever kept a resolution that I know of. Pitiful, I know.

    Can't wait for Friday. :)

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  3. Good for you on the Bible reading and water! Let's see...changes I've made that stuck....about 3 months ago I stopped eating butter and eggs and drinking 1/2 n 1/2 because of my cholesterol. Went for a new test and I'm in the healthy range again. Food is always a tough one for me, so very thankful that these habits stuck and made a difference.

    Great post!

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  4. You are a great example to us, Jill. both of candor and grace.

    Over a year ago, I decided to write every day. Rarely do I neglect this, and I've reaped great benefits.

    Please don't ask me about my resolve to exercise, and listen more than I talk...

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  5. Good Morning!

    Jessica: I love it! You never make resolutions--I think that's the way to go.

    Robyn: Sulfur? Yuck! Great tasting water makes all the difference, doesn't it?

    Georgiana: Awesome! I'm so proud of you. Getting your cholesterol under control is a HUGE accomplishment. Good for you!

    Thanks so much for stopping by!

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  6. Jen: Sometimes it's just making the decision, don't you think? You decided to write every day and now you do. That's great! (Don't ask me about exercise either!)

    Thanks so much for stopping by!

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  7. My resolve to exercise regularly has been a habit I've kept up for over 10 years. About the same time I began drinking more water, like you, and that has stuck as well.

    I like and agree with the two beliefs you mentioned. I think these are key. Am trusting the Lord for more of that consistency in other areas of my life.
    Blessings to you and your readers:)

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  8. I excercise more for sure. :)
    That really stuck from last year.
    This year I'm not making any life changes but I am making writing changes.

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  9. I made the water change in the past few years, drinking more of it in small amounts throughout the day. It's amazing, first, how little I had been drinking, and secondly how it benefits even my energy level. For this year, I'm really working on several projects, managing my time carefully to leave room for all of them. Happy New Year Jill!

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  10. Eating healthier...it made my body and mind feel better.

    Interrupting less...I've been able to understand people better.

    Hey you, I wrote about our meeting today. Thanks again for WHO you are.
    ~ Wendy

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  11. Hey, Jill! I started drinking more water 2 days ago (it had nothing to do with New Year's, believe it or not). I hope it sticks. :0)

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  12. Karen: Welcome! Congrats on the healthy changes that stuck! And, yes, the Lord does it all. :)

    Jennifer: Ooo...writing changes, I'm intrigued!

    Joanne: Funny, I wrote next week's posts and one is about drinking water. I agree--it boosts our energy!

    Wendy: Interrupt less! Ha! I'm not sure it's possible in my family--heh-heh! Was terrific meeting you! I can't wait to hop over to your blog.

    Thanks so much for stopping by!

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  13. Kristen: Yay! It's pretty easy, actually. I sneak water in all the time. Did you move yet? How are you surviving the changes?

    Thanks for stopping by!

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  14. Hi Jill, I started flossing regularly about 25 years ago. Does that count? My Mom always said it's important to care for one's teeth. And she put her money where her kids' mouths were--paying for orthodontia work for all 3 of us girls. So, I'd feel downright guilty if I didn't take proper care. Which reminds me...I need to make a dentist appt. Thanks for the reminder!

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  15. Most of my changes are rather personal...BUT I'd have to say quitting smoking was a big deal for me. I feel SOOOO much better being smoke free. And I stuck with it because I REALLY wanted to. I think wanting to do it for you, not anyone else, makes all the difference.

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  16. I made a conscience effort to live out my dream of trying to make it as a published author. I am a writer. I long for publication through traditional means. And that's what brings me here today. It feels good to follow through with trying to achieve my dream.

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  17. I did the water thing too about twelve years ago, and there hasn't been a day since that I haven't gotten my 8 glasses in, usually more. You are so right about having to believe that you can accomplish it for it to happen. Why even try if you don't think you can.

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  18. Jill, you're such an encouragement. I usually try not to make resolutions around the New Year simply for the sake of making a resolution. I usually try to make "goals" when, like you said, I know it will make my life better and I have the confidence I can achieve them.

    Several years ago I decided to eat healthier and exercise more--I'm still working on it but I get better with each year. I also wanted to spend more time with the kids and my hubby and that's getting better, too!

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  19. One of the lasting changes I'm most proud of is the decision to make a weekly menu and grocery list. I started this about four years ago now, and I've been doing it ever since. I can't believe how it has streamlined my life. I no longer wander into the kitchen at 4:30 and stare at the pantry hoping inspiration will dawn.

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  20. Patrice: I'm a fanatic flosser. My teeth were horrible after I had each child, and flossing has made all the difference!

    Marybeth: Wow! Quitting smoking is one of the hardest things to do--I'm very proud of you. Just think of the life you've given your body!

    T.Anne: It's only a matter of time. I have the same dream and I believe it will happen. Here's to 2010!

    Susan: Adding water is so simple, it makes me wonder why I had trouble before? Love it!

    Cindy: I hear you. I don't make them anymore either. I do set goals and, funny, I accomplish them. Good way to think!

    Erica: Oh my goodness--I do that too! Doesn't it make life better? I've found that it saves me a lot of money and I waste less too. Perfect!

    Thanks so much for stopping by!

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  21. I'm glad you thought of the 2 reasons so I didn't have to. I guess I do have to really believe those in order for a life-change to occur. Thanks! :O)

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  22. Changes that have made my life better: consistent quiet times with the Lord, and regular exercise. The quiet times help me to focus on God and His will for my life. Exercise provides physical benefits, but is also the time that I spend in concentrated prayer. Both truly make a noticable difference!! Thanks for the thought-provoking post, Jill!

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  23. Hi Jill -

    I've exercised on a regular basis for over 10 years. It's vital not only to control my weight, but to keep my back muscles and bones strong.

    For many years, I've made it a habit to spend time with the Lord when I get up. Otherwise, I get busy, and the day gets away from me.

    Blessings,
    Susan :)

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  24. Maria: Both exercise and quiet time with the Lord are vital. I'm sure your life is enhanced by both.

    Susan R: Good for you, sticking with an exercise habit for ten years! And I agree, I read the Bible first thing or it gets away from me.

    Thanks so much for stopping by!

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  25. You nailed it Jill! I belived I could accomplish them, and I believed my life would be better.

    You've given me a lot to think about friend, thanks.

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  26. Tamika: Banishing the doubts seems to do the trick!

    Thanks so much for stopping by!

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  27. I know the changes I'm making this year! I have already begun reading the Bible each day -starting at the beginning. Never have I read it all the way through and it is about time! I love the way my day plays out when I start with it.

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  28. Jill, this is great insight.

    For me it's a confidence thing that makes or breaks it. Maybe my 2010 resolution should be to gain more confidence in myself and what I put work into.

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  29. LOVE this focus on the positive.
    This is a gREAT blog.

    Things that have worked. Spending daily time with God. What started as discipline/small flame has been fanned into a FUN time.

    Same with exercise. I look forward to the freedom of wind in my hair, my breath coming in spurts along with some cool book ideas.

    Partaking often of coffee and chocolate. Sigh. For me it just seems to provide that oomph that adds zip and zest. Go figure?

    Patti
    www.pattilacy.com/blog

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  30. Terri: I know exactly what you mean. My days are better when I start with a chapter of God's word.

    Eileen: It's tough, isn't it? My confidence took a beating this fall. It can be really difficult to press on after trying for a few years to get published, but with God's help, I'm staying motivated.

    Patti: How nice! Thank you. And I'm all for indulging in coffee and chocolate--along with exercising!

    Thanks so much for stopping by!

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  31. I don't make resolutions anymore. I just follow the prompting of my inner voice. It's always right. It's telling me to keep my heart open even when it wants to close. Brr...not easy but worth a try.
    Maryse

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  32. I'm not usually a big resolution-maker, but this year, I really want to try. I think it's a good opportunity to take a step back and brainstorm ways to improve! I could always use a little of that.

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  33. Jill, I rarely make resolutions. Yet I do set goals. I would love to read the Bible on a daily basis. I really would. Good for you that you've stuck with that one.

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  34. Maryse: My conscience/inner voice gets on my nerves sometimes, but it's always right. I agree, we have to listen to our hearts.

    Lisa and Laura: I'm always looking to improve, too. But I'm pretty laid back about it at this point. No sense beating myself up over false expectations!

    Angie: It never felt like a chore, so that's why I've stuck with it!

    Thanks so much for stopping by!

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