Marriage is NOT Outdated

When I log onto the Internet each morning, a slew of headlines attempt to grab my attention. I ignore the Kardashian news and the endless health-care reform debate, but before I click on my e-mail account, one headline succeeds.

"Cameron Diaz says marriage is outdated."

Hmm...must read that one. I head to UsMagazine.com for the scoop. "Cameron Diaz: Marriage is a Dying Institution," (full article is linked) references Cameron's interview in June's Maxim issue where she claims marriage is a dying institution.

"I think we have to make our own rules," she explains. "I don't think we should live our lives in relationships based off old traditions that don't suit our world any longer."

I'm always leery of hearing "we have to make our own rules." And I'm cringing double-time at the assumption that old traditions don't suit our world any longer.

Look, I believe the Bible is God's word, and because of my beliefs, I disagree that we should create our own rules or that we should go against God's teachings to suit current circumstances. If you don't share my beliefs, I understand why you would be more open to Cameron's philosophy. But even if you don't live by the Bible, marriage doesn't have to be tossed out like a primitive washboard.

Marriage is the single biggest blessing in my life. No marriage is perfect, but there's a lot to be said for weathering years of ups and downs and still smiling at each other over an episode of Storage Wars. Marriage anchors me--gives me a security and trust that envelope me every day. Do I worry about the laugh-lines around my eyes or the fact I'm not always the spontaneous, nurturing girl I once was? Yes. But that girl still peeks out for the one guy who thrilled her way back when and continues to make her heart beat faster now.

Marriage is not outdated. Not for me, anyway.

Michael Hyatt has an excellent article, "How to Become Your Spouse's Best Friend," for all those in favor of outdated institutions! Check it out!

Also, the incredible Jessica R. Patch is interviewing me today! If you get a chance, stop by her blog and say "hi"!

Have a magnificent Monday!

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Nurturing the Fragile Writer's Ego

Most writers have dual egos about their writing--the "I'm writing a best-seller" side vs. the "this book swam up the sewage river" side. When we query or submit our work, another side erupts--the vulnerable one. As much as we want the agent or editor to fall madly in love with our words, all too often we deal with silence or rejection.

Continuous rejection can damage our fragile writer's ego--if we let it.

I believe it's vital to find and utilize methods to strengthen our vulnerable ego, or the danger to quit presses too closely. Instead of focusing on our writing, our brains jot off on tangents. "Maybe my query stunk?" "I know there was an extra comma in that paragraph." "Is it the character? The writing? The concept? Me??"

Instead of letting my mind whirl on a merry-go-round of useless what-if's and why's, I evaluate why I'm doubting. If it's because I got a rejection, I study the letter to see if there are any clues as to what went wrong. If an editor gives advice, I give a lot of thought to what is said.

Sometimes I grow doubtful for no reason or for weird reasons. Usually, I'm just scared that it will never happen for me--that I've wasted years and hours and tears and brain cells for a poof in the air. That none of my writing will be available for others to read--a devastating thought.

Whatever the reason, when my ego plunges and doubts swirl, I force myself to focus.

Focus? Great! That helps...not at all. How do I focus when my skin feels paper thin? I'm already focusing too much--on what went wrong. What do I focus on?

Focus on your writing. Focus on your work-in-progress. Focus on improving your grammar, tightening your prose, nailing your characters. When we put our focus on the actual writing, the doubts slip away because we're having fun again. The career side of writing pales with the sheer pleasure of creating.

Never let a blow to your ego kill your dreams. Focus.

How do you nurture your fragile ego?

On a let's-hear-it-for-good-news note--Julie Musil landed an agent!! She's now represented by Karen Grencik of the Karen Grencik Literary Agency! Pop over to her blog, Julie Musil, and congratulate her!! Congratulations, Julie!!
Also, Tess Hardwick's debut book, Riversong, is now available! For more details, head to her website, Tess Hardwick. Congratulations, Tess!

Have a fabulous Monday!

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5 Easy Questions with Keli Gwyn!

Every Wednesday, I ask a writer the same five easy questions. In an effort to support and promote fellow wordsmiths, I feature authors who write a variety of genres, from sweet inspirational to mainstream thrillers. The writers themselves may be aspiring, published, or best-selling authors--all have made an impact on my life.

Thank you for joining me in welcoming… Keli Gwyn!!



I met Keli through her amazing blog, Romance Writers on the Journey. When Keli graciously interviewed me, it was a highlight in my writing career! Since then, Keli has finalled in major contests such as the Golden Heart. Last year, she accepted representation from Rachelle Gardner of Wordserve Literary, and she recently announced the fabulous news that Barbour Publishing bought her book.

 Let's get to it!

1. Beverage of choice?

 Sweet tea. My mom grew up in Texas, and I was raised on tea that could qualify as syrup. I’ve got a glass beside me now, although I’ve cut back on the amount of sugar these days.

2. Any pets?

We have two long-haired orange and white cats, Sandy and Dandy. Sandy is my writing buddy, but his brother much prefers to hang out with my hubby.

3. Dream vacation?

A driving tour of the East Coast during the fall colors. I’m a California gal who would love to get a taste of the other coast and an opportunity to dip my toes in the Atlantic.

4. What are you listening to right now?

A CD called Songbirds by the Stream. One of the characters in my WIP has a thing for birds and can recognize many birdcalls, so this is mood music.

5. What's for dinner?

I’m a lousy cook who would be happy eating at Taco Bell most nights, but after 23 years of marriage I’ve not been able to convince Gwynly to appreciate a burrito the way I do. So, I’m making meatloaf tonight, one of my few specialties. Since we’re now Empty Nesters, this makes enough for two or three meals. Let’s hear it for leftovers.

Keli, cutting back on sugar? Say it isn't so! Your kitties sound delightful. I miss my Himalayan, Cookie, another long-haired beast! And I am with you on the road trip to the east coast. We'll stop at every Taco Bell and McDonald's. Who else is in?

Thank you, Keli, for participating! I'm so excited for you and can't wait to read your debut book, A Bride Opens Shop in El Dorado, California, which will be available July 1, 2012!

So, tell me, what are you sipping today?

Keli Gwyn is a writer of historical inspirational romance represented by Rachelle Gardner; the wife of a British sports car enthusiast; the proud mother of a college student; and a serious Taco Bell addict. Her debut novel, a story set in the heart of California's Gold County, will be published by Barbour Publishing in the summer of 2012, a fact that still makes Keli giddy—and very grateful—when she thinks about it. You can learn more about Keli at her website and blog, or find her on Facebook and Twitter.

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Using Dropbox to Share Articles on Your Blog

You've written a terrific article, formatted it with pictures and links, and you want to share it with your blog readers. Except...how can you link an article from your computer when you need a URL for it?

You scratch your head, play around with your blog service, and finally paste the thing into a new page where you lose the formatting you carefully created. Frustrating, to say the least.

Since I have a website, my articles are hosted there, and I can easily grab the URL and link them. But what about writers who don't have websites? Do they have other options?

I discussed this recently with Constance Phillips and she gave me an excellent idea. Use a file-sharing service such as Dropbox.

Dropbox is a free service that offers up to 2GB storage. If you need more storage, you can purchase it. It's simple to sign up with--only a valid e-mail address and password are necessary. Naturally, you do not have to use Dropbox; you can use any file-sharing service.

After downloading the software, you click and drag files from your computer to your Dropbox account. If you place them in the Public Folder, you can Copy the link, and link them anywhere, including your blog or a widget on your sidebar. (To link one of your articles, type the title of the article in your blog post, highlight it, and use the link button to type or copy/paste the URL.)

Remember, not everyone has Microsoft Word or whatever word processor you use. For a universal way to share your work, consider converting your file to a .pdf file. Plenty of free file converters, like PrimoPDF, abound on the web. A .pdf file allows anyone who downloads Adobe Acrobat to read your work, and Acrobat is a universal, free program.

Type the URL of your blog, your name, and copyright information into your footer. This allows readers to click back to your blog (be sure to include http:// before the link), reminds them who wrote it, and discourages theft of your work. Your footer would look something like this:

http://jillkemerer.blogspot.com/ Jill Kemerer. Copyright 2011. All rights reserved

Do you have a genius method of sharing your articles online? I'd love to hear it!

Thanks!

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Do You Need a Website?

Websites.

Do unpublished authors need them? Do published authors need them?

In my opinion, published authors absolutely need a website. Readers like me love learning about our favorite authors, and we need a way to find their back-lists, new releases, and scheduled appearances. We also devour author biographies, and we e-mail authors to let them know we loved their books. Readers are flocking to the Internet to purchase e-books, so it makes sense for authors to make it easy to find information about them and their books.

I also believe unpublished authors can benefit from having a website, but it's not essential. Unpublished authors who want a website can either hire a designer, design their own site, or they can use a blogging service to create a website. When I started blogging over two years ago, Blogger didn't have many of the exciting features it currently does. One fabulous improvement is the ability to create static pages to make your blog look and function like a website. You can also direct your blogspot URL to a custom domain. (Wordpress offered both of these features long before Blogger, but I chose Blogger for a variety of reasons, one being the ease of following, finding, and linking to other blogs.)

Anyone can simply set up a blog, create static pages, and have an instant website--for free.

The drawbacks to creating a simulated website through a blog service include less freedom with overall look and design, and less support. Most web-hosting services offer 24 hour support, e-mail addresses, protection from hackers, and tons of online storage, whereas your blog account can get hacked and deleted, support exists only in forums, and you won't have access to many features a web-hosting service offers.

Still, I think creating the look of a website through a blog service is a terrific way for aspiring authors to promote themselves and their writing.



Here are essentials for an unpublished author's website (in no particular order):

1. Easy navigation.

There should be links to every page in the site and the navigation bar should be in the same spot on every page.

2. A biography with a good picture.

Keep the biography engaging, list your credentials, tell why and what you write. The picture does not have to be professional, but do wear a tasteful outfit and have someone take the best picture possible.

3. A page about what you write.

This could be as simple as stating the titles, genre, and word counts of completed books, a short story or article, or back-cover-like blurbs for each book. I don't recommend putting up sample chapters. Sample chapters belong in a requested submission, not on an unpublished author's website.

4. Links to your social networks.

Only include those you're active on. Facebook, Twitter, Linked-In, Goodreads, and so forth.

5. An e-mail address to contact you.

I understand wanting to maintain privacy and block spam, but there is no good reason for an author to withhold a contact method. Create a dedicated e-mail under your author name. I regularly e-mail authors of blogs, but if there isn't any way to contact them, I can't.

Published authors should publish a website before their first book is published. Good author websites make the reader want to buy an author's books. They also give numerous options for the reader to connect with the author through signing up for a newsletter, following the author on Twitter, Facebook, or other social networks, and by clearly stating upcoming appearances and when the next book will be released. Book covers should be linked for easy purchasing.

Here are essentials for a published author's website (in no particular order):

1. Easy navigation.

There should be links to every page in the site and the navigation bar should be in the same spot on every page.

2. A detailed author biography with professional picture.

Readers want to connect with the author, so include a picture. Franchises such as Portait Innovations offer business packages for around $70.oo and this includes copyright releases of certain poses to use online. The biography should be engaging--less business-like, more friendly.
3. Clearly stated achievements.

If the author won a prestigious award, made it on a best-seller's list or any other fabulous achievement--this should be prominently shown throughout the site. You're not bragging--you're simply informing anyone who stops by that other people like your books. The implied message: this author's books are good so buy one.

4. An updated appearance schedule.

Speaking at a library? Having a booksigning? Include the place, date and time. This shows you're actively promoting your books and that you encourage readers to interact with you.

5. A page dedicated to your books.

Feature book jackets, reviews, blurbs, and a link to purchase the book. Include a complete backlist. Readers like me are salivating to read every book by the author, and we do buy backlists.

6. Contact button.

A pop-up to e-mail the author should appear. A page with other contact information such as a P.O. Box can be included if desired.

7. Newsletter sign-up.

There are many great newsletter services. It's up to the author how often to send a newsletter, but most of the authors I sign up with produce them quarterly.

8. Blog.

If the author blogs, this should be either incorporated into the site or linked on every page.

9. Social media links.

Every page should have buttons for readers to connect with the author on Facebook, Twitter, Goodreads, Linked-In, Shelfari, or whatever sites the author is active on.

10. Press kit.

This is for members of the media to easily access information about you and your writing in the event they want to interview you. Need an example? Check out Alley Blake's Press Release Page.
I only touched on the basics of websites today. I'm full of opinions, right or wrong, on them and will gladly share my thoughts if you have any questions.

Is there anything you would like to know about author websites?


Have a terrific Friday!

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Setting Annual Goals

Setting annual goals? Yikes. This blog is supposed to be motivating...encouraging...sweet...sparkling. What happened??

Something good happened--no, something great! Setting annual goals may be the greatest thing you've ever done. Why? Statistics show that people who write their goals down achieve significantly more goals than those who don't. Amazing, isn't it?

And, come on, you're a writer. Don't you live for picking up a pen and paper and writing something down? Anything? Gotcha, didn't I?

Why does the prospect of writing annual goals fill some of us (yes, me) with such a sense of foreboding and dread then? Maybe because a written goal becomes real, solid, tangible. Vague ideas about accomplishing something flutter out the window.

Are your palms sweaty? Breath coming a little short? I know, I know. Bring it down. It'll be okay. Here's what I'd like you to do. Look at the following and apply it to your situation.

For you hobbiests: Do you write short stories? Articles? Novels? Think ahead to January 2010. How many completed short stories or articles would make you feel terrific? Six? Twelve? What about you novelists? Have you started a novel and never finished it? Wouldn't it feel amazing to have a completed novel this time next year? Or you can start and finish a new novel.

For you potential career writers: How many books can you realistically (translation: comfortably) write this year? Half? One? Two? Only you know. What length books do you write? Category? Single Title?

Do you know what length to aim for? Category novels differ, but most are between 50,000 and 65,000 words. For single title fiction, the word count varies. According to Jack M. Bickham's book Scene & Structure, books have a better chance of being published if they are between 60,000-90,000 words. Sure, the Harry Potter series missed that target by a long shot, but if you're serious about getting published, aim for a length an editor knows will be profitable. And why are we talking about word length anyhow? More on that Wednesday...

For you career writers: Are you under contract to write any books this year? Do the books excite you? If the books are part of an ongoing series, would you consider writing short stories outside of your genre now and then to keep your writing fresh? What about reading? Did you have enough time last year to read the fiction, non-fiction, and magazines you love? What feeds your soul creatively? Are you happy with the level of promotion you're doing or do you want to ramp it up a notch?

Think about these questions and write down the answers.

Now you have a list. It might have one thing on it. It might fill up a paper. As long as you have at least one goal, I'm happy. If you have several goals, do they belong in different categories? For example, I have six categories of goals for 2009: writing, submitting, contests, associations, craft, and promotion. All six have meaning for me, not necessarily for you. A few years ago I had one category: writing. Life changes and goals change. That's okay!

Come back on Wednesday when we'll discuss how to break down the annual goals into monthly goals.
And...
Get motivated! It's Monday!

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