Friday, August 28, 2009

Conference: Unexpected Feelings

Many who return from a conference come back inspired. They dive into their current project with renewed zeal. They float for weeks afterward, aloft on the residual excitement. New pages turn out effortlessly.

But...

I came back inspired, yet frustrated.


Spending every free minute with writers was incredible and uplifting. But when I got back home, I faced the tedium of everyday life. My schedule was extra strained just having to make sense of conference notes, author cards, and unpacking. It's enough to overwhelm anyone.

Worse, good friends were e-mailing me about the new book they'd started. They were writing with fire under their seats, whereas the only thing firing up at my house was the laundry in the dryer. I was happy for them but I wished to be in the same position.

I still had two passes of revisions left on my manuscript. I couldn't start a new book, because I refuse to start a new project until the current one is 100% complete. And I was already tired of revising. So all that terrific energy smoldered within, waiting to project itself. Did I mention I have about half the time to devote to writing in the summer as I do in the winter? Yeah, the burning built to an orange glow.

I'll admit it. I got a little ugly. A bit disappointed. Flat out sick of revising. The orange glow grew to code red.

I finished the revisions. And the volcano didn't erupt. All that conference excitement? It's still there, waiting to be poured into the next project. It just had to wait a bit.

I'd love to hear how you deal with conference aftermath. Did you bring home any negative energy? Or is it all rainbows and delight for you? I hope it's the latter! But if not, well, you aren't alone!

Have a terrific weekend!

32 comments:

  1. I have never been to a conference, but I do understand the feelings of returning to everyday life after having been away somewhere amazing. And yeah, I can see why you might not be riding on ponies and bathing in rainbows. I think I would feel that way too. I usually need things to settle. I have to unpack emotions, not just the suitcase :)

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  2. Good Morning!

    Tabitha: "Unpack emotions." I love that phrase! I never thought of it that way--thanks!

    Thanks so much for stopping by!

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  3. Jill, I've just loved getting your insider look into the conference. I can imagine when I get home, I'll be on "clean the house mode" for about a week. It'll be a disaster with just my hubby and the kids! :) But hopefully I'll come home with great friendships and contacts and lots of new information to spur on my writing career!

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  4. No, negative feelings--except when I come back and find out what a great time the family had without me. LOL!

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  5. Jody: Maybe you'll come home to a spotless abode? Hey, we can dream, right? I can't wait to hear all about your experience!

    Jennifer: They aren't supposed to have fun without you--didn't they get the memo? :)

    Thanks for stopping by!

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  6. I think the conference "postpartum" especially afflicts moms. You're on a high, surrounded by writers and everything writerly, then BLAM, you're back home in the creativity-killing routine of home. It's hard to keep the fire burning with such intensity when we're in our home ruts. :)

    Just keep working at it when you can and you'll meet your goals. And plan another writing getaway on the calendar so you have something to look forward to!

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  7. Ugh, revising is one of my least favorite things to do. But I'm with you, I don't like juggling multiple projects at once. Congrats on finishing up the revisions and good luck with the WIP!

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  8. Hmmm, I came home exhausted and a little overwhelmed. I hadn't even finished my first manuscript so I had a lot of info in my brain about submissions that I couldn't do anything with. But I loved going through my paperwork. :-)

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  9. Angie: Nothing to kill the creative juices like tripping over LEGOS, right? I agree with you completely!

    Lisa and Laura: Aww, thanks! And it's nice to hear I'm not alone in the must-finish-project-before-I-start-a-new-one mentality.

    Jessica: Oh, I feel better, now! And I agree about the paperwork--I loved reading all the notes.

    Thanks so much for stopping by!

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  10. Haven't been, but I lived vicariously through your experience this week. I am going to a FREE book reading this weekend by myself. Woo Hoo. :D

    Of course, hypothetically I'd return home and open the blinds to have a little birdy land on my finger and whisper in my ear wonderful lines to my WIP that I would promptly fasten myself in my seat and write all in one sitting. :D Fun to dream. Happy weekend.
    ~ Wendy

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  11. I think it is natural to come back feeling a little flat, if for no other reason than something you have anticipated for such a long while is now over.

    And the unreal land of writer's conference collides with the very real land of laundry, soccar practice, and orthodontist appts. Real life seems very prosaic after the mountaintop of a long-anticipated conference.

    For me, the easiest thing has been to anticipate that let-down feeling, realize that it's normal, and rekindle the excitement after the dust has settled.

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  12. That is the hardest thing for me because, much as I love him, my hubby is a slob if I'm not around.

    I hate leaving for more than two days because I'll spend HOURS with the laundry/unpacking/cleaning when I get home.

    One of the BEST things I ever did - I have a good friend come over and clean the house for me the day before I come home. Then I can come back and unpack. Done! The dishwasher is unloaded and reloaded, the floors are clean...and my hubby is usually SO freaked out about having someone else clean the house that he helps out!

    Now I can come home, sit right down, and write :)

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  13. I have never been to a conference, but have already kind of considered the aftermath. We have a mini-vacation planned for after the conference to go see my sister's family (she just had her baby this week). I really won't have to time to work on anything, much less sort through and absorb conference related material. Oy to the ve!

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  14. I've never been to an actual writing conference, but sometimes I see or hear something that really inspires me to write. Sometimes it backfires, though, and I leave discouraged that I just can't do it. I think confidence might be my greatest struggle when it comes to writing; it's the fear that I can spend my life in pursuit of publishing and it still might not happen. It's a good thing writing isn't --primarily, at least--about the goal, huh?

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  15. I've never been to a conference, so I can't report on how I deal with the aftermath, but I know I'm like you in that I can't move on until my current project is 100% complete.

    We writers live on a rollercoaster, and that's all there is to it. If it helps you any, I'm moving like a snail through my rewrites, and I haven't had any fire in a long time, just a flicker and an orange glow. I guess it's better than nothing. :D

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  16. I haven't been to a conference, but I know that feeling of being tired of revisions. It does zap the creative energy out of you. But like you, I have a hard time moving on until a project is 100% complete.

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  17. Wendy: Free reading?! Sounds awesome!! And I saw the most adorable hummingbird this morning. I'm sending him your way to whisper those lines in your ear :)

    Erica: You hit it. I love real life, but I love my writing dreams too. Sometimes they collide!

    Karin: Great advice! Hire a cleaning lady before I return...Who knew??

    Ralene: Congrats on the new addition to your sister's family! And don't worry, all that info will wait until you get home. I'll be thinking of you!

    Kristen T.: Don't we all! Confidence can be elusive, especially when we're getting rejections or discouraged with our writing. But perseverance brings confidence.

    Lady Glamis: Sigh...feeling for you. I'll gladly send my red hot coals to you! Except they were more frustration than anything. Keep going!

    Lazy Writer: Revisions drain me. Oh, the first few passes are fun, but the nitty-gritty passes make me want to bury myself in the garden.

    Thanks so much for stopping by!

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  18. I return from a conference fatigued. First I have to catch up on my sleep. I have a hubby who was a bachelor for many years, so he keeps the house in good shape. (Yeah, I'm blessed.) Once I'm rested, I reflect on what I learned at the conference and how I can incorporate it into my current and future projects.

    I've attended five conferences in the three and a half years I've been writing and have learned to let go of expectations. That way I'm surprised when good things happen and not overly disappointed when they don't. This mindset helps with the post-conference processing.

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  19. I've never been to a conference before, but this sounds an awful lot like the feelings after a church retreat. It's such a rejuvenating and uplifting time...and then you come home. And things feel good for a few days and you really try to live those new lessons you learned. But in reality, life kicks in and the real world takes over and it's harder and harder to find that same sense of peace.

    It's still in us, though, we just have to keep patient and apply what we learned in the right parts of our lives.

    Have a great weekend!

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  20. I think it's revisions in general. They suck the life out of the fun of writing! Maybe we should start a writing-exchange program where we write all our manuscripts, then exchange them with other writers for the revision process! Doesn't seem so painful when it's someone else's work we're pulverizing.

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  21. Keli: You are blessed! And that's terrific advice to let go of our expectations.

    Cindy: Exactly! The peace pretty much evaporates at the front door.

    Stephanie: I love the exchange program. It's kind of like the cookie exchange at Christmastime! Wouldn't that be a hoot?

    Thanks so much for stopping by!

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  22. It sounds very familiar to me. I've come back excited and then plunged back into my own self-doubts about my project but the good news is, it always makes me try harder!

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  23. I always come home tired. Real life doesn't consist of all the fun, exciting, inspiring activities of conferences.

    I sleep, dream, then write :)

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  24. I seem to always come home to so much backlog that I can't get to what I really want to do. It is so frustrating. I try to tell myself it will all come together and that the timing just isn't right at this moment. That helps, but it is still frustrating!

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  25. Terri: Yes, it does spur ambition!

    Kim Kasch: Welcome! Real life doesn't, does it? Boo! But we can take the memories and work with them.

    Kara: You're right. Sometimes our lives are just busier than other times!

    Thanks so much for stopping by!

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  26. I'll be attending my first conference in February. I'm very excited about it, but I'm sure there will be a letdown. Thank you for visiting my blog! I've been poking around here and there is so much excellent information - I'll definitely be back!

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  27. I always feel pressured to produce something after I return home, as if I have to prove that it was worth the time and money to go. That's not the point, I'm pretty sure.

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  28. Linda: Welcome! You are going to have so much fun at the conference. And February is a perfect time to go--beat the mid-winter doldrums, right?

    2nd Cup of Coffee: Welcome! I know! The pressure of getting our money's worth--uggh! Although, I have to admit the information I got was priceless. I'm so thankful for the workshops I attended.

    Thanks so much for stopping by!

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  29. I've not thought about this aspect of the conference. I have so much anticipation for the ACFW conference, that I haven't thought about what it might be like when I get home. I always said I'd start querying once I get back...that's a nerve-wracking thought!

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  30. Hi Jill -

    I came back with mixed emotions. As usual, my non-fiction side won out over the fiction. Like you, I was sent back to the drawing board.

    It's easy to focus on the 10% negative. I'm counting my blessings for the 90% positive - all the great writers, faculty, and workshops.

    Blessings,
    Susan :)

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  31. The afterglow was apparent for quite sometime. I think I loved bonding with other writers the most. Meeting 'famous' agents and Ms. Mitchard of Deep End of The Ocean fame didn't hurt either. Still wish something more productive came out of it though...

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  32. Katie: Definitely query when you get back! And if you need me to virtually hold your hand or to nudge you--e-mail me!

    Susan: You're right about focusing on the 90% good. I don't think anyone's "real life" completely accomodates their writing desires. Good thing to remember.

    T.Anne: Bonding with other authors was my favorite part too. Didn't matter if they were pubbed, unpubbed, or had even finished a book--I loved them all!

    Thanks so much for stopping by!

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