And My Day Disappears

8:00 AM. Shiny new day. Happy times! I'm ready to tackle my to-do list.



2:00 PM. What?? What happened? How did six hours pass? Did I get anything done? Please tell me something got checked off my to-do list.

5:00 PM. Seriously? Five? Now? I don't believe it. Tiny gremlins snuck in and changed all the clocks. It's the only explanation. Or maybe I got sucked into some weird sci-fi time loophole? Hmm...not ruling that one out.

10:00 PM. Not only did I not complete my to-do list, but I also failed at my plan for the evening. I was supposed to relax tonight. Relax and read. But did that happen? No. Where did the day go??

***

I had too many days this summer that went down exactly like this. Did I actually accomplish anything? Yes. But I felt frazzled and behind, like I'd been swept into a time tornado and didn't have the strength to break free.

However, I decided to fight back and reclaim my day. I'm still working on it, but so far, I'm accomplishing more and relaxing again--win, win!

Here are the steps I'm taking to take back my day:

1. Analyze current schedule to determine what works and what doesn't

When I reviewed how I typically spent each day, I quickly realized I had let social media take over my mornings--yet I couldn't fit one of my favorite activities in--reading writer blogs. It frustrated me that I was spending hours each day ineffectively.

My solution? Split my social media marathon into two sessions; one in the morning, the other in the afternoon. This freed up a large chunk of my most valuable work time, the morning.

2. Set daily goals and write down the actual time it takes to complete them

I always set daily goals, and I usually meet them, even if I have to work on them later in the day. But I knew I'd let my priorities slip.

My solution? Next to each goal, write the actual start and end time. This helps me be more realistic about how long it takes me to write and schedule a blog post or whatever task I'm working on. It also dissipates my anxiety of feeling like I didn't accomplish anything. I can look at my daily planner and clearly see that I spent 3 hours plotting, writing, or networking.

3. Build relaxation and fun into the day

Sometimes I get so caught up in "achieving" I miss out on the essentials in life. I struggle with this aspect the most.

My solution? Remind myself that relaxing, exercising, and reading are not optional. They are essential parts of my day. Your essentials may differ from mine, but we all have activities our souls crave. No one is going to force me to relax, exercise, or read, and I am not being a hero by shoving my needs to the side. I'm hurting myself. No thank you!

Does your day ever disappear from you? What do you do to reclaim it? Share your tips! I love to hear them!

Have a wonderful weekend!

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Transient Friends

This month we're talking friends--the good, the bad, the irresistible. One of the hardest parts of friendships, for me, is that not all are equal. Some will naturally fade even though I genuinely like the friend and vice-versa. In each phase of my life, I've been blessed with some wonderful transient friends.

It starts, well, how any friendship starts. Maybe we work at the same company, or our kids start playing together on the playground, or we sit next to each other at book club. We quickly hit it off and begin to spend time together. We might meet on our lunch break, or plan a playdate for the kids, or head to a coffee shop to talk about books.

Soon, we're sharing daily minutae, and everything's great.

But...she gets transferred. The kids no longer want to play together. The book club dissolves. Suddenly, it's more difficult to get together. We still call once in a while, but we have less to say. Then we're swapping Christmas cards once a year and that's that.

I used to feel guilty that I couldn't make every friendship last, but I was missing the point. We will always have people entering and exiting our lives. We change. They change. But we can hold on to our memories of a sweet interlude together.

If I happen to answer the phone one day and it's my old pal from book club, I settle into my most comfy chair, get a huge smile on my face, and pick up where we left off.

Have you had transient friends? Does it bother you when a friendship naturally fades?

Join me on Friday when we talk about problem friendships.

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Envy: Writer Style

A few years ago, I leafed through a Better Homes and Garden Magazine and stopped to read an article about a pretty Arts & Crafts home. The home itself was brand new, with tons of square-footage and created with top-of-the-line, enviromentally helpful materials. I smiled, enjoying the pictures of the house, and read the first few paragraphs of the article.


Then a twisting, spewing, ugly fury rose within me. My eyes might have bugged out a little--I don't know, I couldn't see them (*wink, wink*), but I know exactly what turned me into an envious monster.

So-and-so writes books for Harlequin Mills & Boon.

What? What?! She had my job--my dream job! No fair!!

I devoured the article and, with a little too much oomph, tossed the mag on the floor. Okay, I threw the thing. Then, I did what any envious, married wannabe writer does--I complained to my spouse. Look at this. Look! Look! She writes for Harlequin. She's published. She's my age--maybe younger--definitely younger--she's in her twenties! Waaahhh!

Later that night, I felt awful. Why would I begrudge this obviously talented lady her career? What did it have to do with me, after all?

I hate being envious.

The incident still sticks in my brain. Until that point, I had the vague idea that being a published author--through Harlequin no less--was akin to being an actor on a hit sitcom, totally out of the realm of most people's reality. But this woman was real, and she was young, and she was published.

It clarified something important to me. Deep in the crevices of my being, I wanted to be a published author. I would never be content tucking my books into the closet and not seeing them on store shelves.

What's funny to me today is the fact that I did not envy the house. Sure, the home sparkled, had scads of space, and would be on most people's dream house lists, but it didn't matter to me. The woman's profession did.

Have you ever envied a complete stranger for having the profession you want? What turns you into an envious maniac?

Side note: Jody Hedlund launched her brand new website today! If you get a chance, go over and check it out. Her blog is linked from any page in her site, and if you leave a comment, you'll be entered in a drawing to win a $25.00 Amazon gift card! Her site is linked above or you can go directly to http://jodyhedlund.com/.

Join me on Friday to make one goal!

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The Spotlight Factor

I have a theory about writers. We crave attention but loathe the spotlight.

I know, I know, I shouldn't stereotype, shouldn't generalize such a diverse and enormous group of people, but why do we choose writing as our outlet? Why not acting? Singing? Even autioneering?



I can only speak for myself. I want to be heard but don't always know how to say what I feel.


Many writers are shy and would rather lick two-day-old raw meat than speak in front of a group of people. Some aren't comfortable even in a group of people. Yet, these same writers express themselves with jaw-dropping clarity on paper.

It's not that we're anti-social or shriveled up in our own little worlds--we simply feel awkward with all eyes on us. When the spotlight beams our way, we all react differently. I, for one, tend to get louder, more frenetic, and will get silly to make people feel at ease. I have no problem laughing at my own expense, but I'm thrilled to slink away into the shadows after.

Do you crave attention but loathe the spotlight? How would you describe your social level of comfort?

Join me on Wednesday for a twist on Twitter and Facebook.

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Obsess Much?

Passion? Obsession? Is there a difference? Yes, but there's a fine line separating the two.

I'm one of those people who latches onto something and digs deeper, longer, to get to the very root of it. I'm never content with skimming the surface. For example, at the library a few weeks ago, I grabbed a photography book of Audrey Hepburn. The slim picture book gave a brief overview of her life, and I became fascinated. Instead of returning the book and moving on, I checked out more pictures online, ordered several books about her from the library, and toyed with renting a selection of her films.

I do not have time for this level of Audrey studying. Repeat: Do Not Have Time.

Yet, I'm squeezing in chapters of "What Would Audrey Do?" by Pamela Keogh. Just pored over an incredible photography book which chronicled her life on the set of Sabrina. And yes, I'm sure I'll be renting several of her films in the near future.

I'm like that with any interesting topic. And I'm especially like that with my own books.

My office door is like the rabbit hole Alice falls into. I open it and lose track of time. If I didn't have my watch, my children would never get picked up from school. If I didn't pick them up from school, we would not eat dinner because I would still be in the office! All I have to do is turn on my laptop and the hours disappear.

Passion. Obsession? Call it what you will, it's a part of the writer's life.

Join me on Friday to set one goal!

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