Monday, July 14, 2014

Mom Guilt in the Summer

Every summer rolls around with me envisioning all the fun things the kids and I will do. Five years ago, I hit on my ideal summer schedule--writing related work all morning, errands and outings in the afternoon. But life changes. The kids change. And I change too.

This summer has proven one thing to me. I am soooo NOT superwoman!!

Move over Brangelina, we have a new power couple, "Mophie!" This is my cousin Lacy and her adorable weiner dog, Mo, Sophie's doggie boyfriend! Aren't they cute? 

The summer scramble started the day after school let out. We packed our car as full as its ever been and drove to upstate New York for my son's week-long baseball tournament. When we returned, we aired out the wet camping gear, unpacked, and headed up north for the day to visit my dad. The next week I caught up on the writing work I'd skipped the previous week. Then another baseball tournament as well as my daughter's running group intervened with my goals. Just when I started to meet my business goals, we headed to Michigan to spend a long weekend with both sets of families.

Last week was major catch-up time with haircuts, shopping, and what-not. You know the drill. You forget how time-consuming errands can be until you have several in one week. No time to squeeze in any of the fun stuff I hoped to do.

Anyway, we all make choices. Because of my dad's condition, one of my choices is to drive the two-and-a-half hours north to visit him about twice a month. I can't always get there, but I try. We also chose to allow my son to join a fall sport that requires summer practices. My daughter has summer practices for her fall sport. This means we're not able to travel at all during the month of August. It also means I'm driving the mom-taxi most weekday mornings in July.

I was feeling too busy, stressed, and guilty. But I'm being kinder to myself, letting go of the mom guilt!

I had to give up some of my fantasies of fun for this summer. That's okay. We've fit a quick zoo trip in. I'll head to the pool or beach soon. If it's not the most exciting summer ever, oh well. My family can benefit from a relaxing, semi-boring season for once!

Do you ever feel guilty in the summer? Like thinking of all the things you planned on doing but realizing there's no way you'll be able to fit them in?

Have a terrific Monday!!


15 comments:

  1. Just dance as fast as you can. That's all anyone can expect.And kick the guilt. It only leads to stress.

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    1. I'm finally doing just that. Adjusting to new responsibilities takes a little trial and error!

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  2. Jill, I hear ya on the mom guilt! Whenever the boys are relaxing in front of the computer while I'm working, I feel like a bad mommy! :(

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    1. Me too!! But why do we feel so guilty? We're working. Ugh!! It's hard. ;)

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  3. I always feel guilty in the summers! My son has lots of activities and my daughter doesn't, which doesn't help. Today I told her I'll take her and a friend to the pool, but her friend is out of town...doing cool stuff! Will have to make it up to her later.

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    1. Boy do I understand! My son has lots of friends in our neighborhood. Plus, he's busy with summer sports. Now that my daughter can drive, it's getting easier. :)

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  4. Always! It's like a little clock is ticking in my background reminding me of all the fun stuff we're NOT doing and time is slipping past!

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  5. Jill: There will be a time when your children are living somewhere else. They won't even remember the times you had 'mom- guilt' and you will have time to do what you need to do and, even, maybe what you want to do. Enjoy your children while they are home.

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    1. Good point! I do enjoy them--I shouldn't feel guilty about it!

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  6. I totally relate to what you posted. I too am trying to be kinder to myself. I do wish the schools would not have any thing going on until August. Our practices started the week after school was out.

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    1. We need to be nice to ourselves! Why is it so hard, though? :) The older the kids get, the more involved their sports have become. I don't mind because it helps them focus and stay in great shape, but it's hard to keep it together!

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  7. Oh, Jill, I so needed this post! I was feelng the mommy guilt and the writer guilt this morning all at once. I had 45 minutes to write during swim lessons, but then my daughter got a bloody nose, so I let her sit for a minute, then sent her back out, but the nose started again. No work done and only half a swim lesson. Oh, well, there's a season for everything and summer is not the easiest time to write. :)

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    1. I have been there, Janice!! The worst!! All our good intentions fly out the window sometimes. It's hard!

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